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All songs written, performed and recorded by Rich Pagen.

Recorded in Tarzana, CA.

© 1995 Rich Pagen.

1. SAND DOLLAR WEDDING

 I remember the sand dollar from the bight, infinite possibilities streaming from my sight.  It was something from nothing or so it seemed.  More there in store there, like from a dream.  A close look was all it took, it seemed so small but I could see it all.  Now I begin again but no sand dollar, this beach is different but no larger or no smaller.  It was hard to do, treading through the soft sand.  Take a chance no second glance at my plan.  Here I am, I do all I can, the moment’s now, not where but how.  Haste to find, look all day until the night.  Of all the sand dollars I happened to find, no hand of fate was guiding me blind.  Choices lead and plant the seed, pave my way.  So don’t lock the door if you want more of life today.  Answer the ring and always sing.  The power’s there, seize it everywhere.  I haven’t seen the sand dollar in a year or two, but it’s wisdom is still shining through.  Everywhere, reasons to care and lessons to learn.  Joy and sorrow each will borrow tears and take their turn.  For each of us, it’s a must.  We are heading to a sand dollar wedding.  

2. METAPHORICAL RELIEF

Yesterday I hit the wall, tire’s spinning, I couldn’t move at all.  It happens sometimes when you climb you’re bound to fall.  Little things got under my skin, with growing anger I knew I couldn’t win.  Just sitting there, I watched confusion set in.  I’ll take my advice and be immune, cover my years and sing my own tune, enjoy all the wonderful things that are here, keep my hands on the wheel, I’ll steer.  The sun’s back out and I am too, despite the dam the river flows through.  Back on the horse and on course for somewhere new.  Here I am, I’m on my way.  Will I travel far by the end of the day?  I brought a map, it’s on my lap, but what does it say?  Why bind myself with chains?  Just loosen up on those reigns.  There’s nothing I have to do, so why create pain?  Tomorrow you may hit the wall, tires spinning you can’t move at all.  It happens sometimes when you climb you’re bound to fall.

3. Spotted window

Hello, can you hear me?  Can you help me?  Just be near me.  It's so loud, deafening, the silence goes on.  The sand has fallen through the years, creating memories of both joy and tears.  Time has picked me apart and I'm going down.  If only I could see the sun's glow from the other side of my spotted window.  I know you walk by everyday.  As you sleep your phone is inches away.  No one here to share my final days.  Where has all our hard work brought us?  To a world where we become obsolete and useless.  I'm still here but no one remembers me.  What's that you say?  Can I hear you?  Can I help you?  Just be near you?  I'm sorry, so sorry.  I've got no time left for you.

Searching for an understanding of all this, a map of the way to happiness, sidetracked by all the craziness, maybe I need to get away.  Onboard a plane for a foreign land, the fate of the world is in my hands.  I'll be content ,now I understand what I'm looking for must lie this way.  While all is new I feel I've got it made.  No boredom here, a simple trade.  My land for theirs but soon excitement fades.  Nothing different here, hear what I say.  I arrive back home several years under my belt.  But negative feelings are still felt.  The one thing I'll always have is myself.  Perhaps searching inside is the way.  The outside world will always change, can't control that it's down the drain.  The perception of things is in your range.  So please understand, your happiness is in your hands.

During a relaxing moment, I wondered what it's for.  Many wear the face of anguish, stretching grabbing hands for more.  Everyone's climbing from the floor.  When asked why they say they're not sure.  What is this mysterious lure?  Hey, you may ask why.  A common thought of our time: build and grow at any cost.  No one knows where this comes from.  No one realized what is lost.  No time to stop and look around, walking quickly eyes to the ground.  Are any answers really found?  Hey, remember you may ask why.  What are we trying to accomplish?  What rewards could we gain doing what doesn't please us most of every day.  They say, "People have done the same before us.  This is what we need for success.  We are just paying our dues."  Hey, remember you may ask why.  So many ways to spend your time: family, friends and lovers too, creative thinking or exploration.  What would you rather do?  There are no chains to bind you, the sky's as open as it's blue.  The only limit is what you make.  Remember you may ask why.

Woke up today, just like any other day.  Washed, dressed, fed myself and I'm on my way.  Arrived at work to find my job was doomed, it would happen soon, now I'm out of the game, it'll never be the same.  Went back to my home wishing I could share my problems with a friend, I can't find one anywhere.   My head in my hands...what to do?  I'll soon be through.  Then anxiety grabbed a hold of me.  Time kept creeping by snatching my funds as it went.  They shut off the phone, my car went to pay the rent.  Now I'm trapped in isolation, desperation.  Wish I had someone to turn to but I don't know who.  Lost my home today, now I have nowhere to go.  I fear for my life, if you could only know.  I take what I can with me, wander down the street, sleep in the park, have nightmares in the dark.  I'm so cold tonight, shivering beneath a tree.  But I can't sleep anyway, too busy watching people watch me.  My stomach's tied in knots, I'm alone, nowhere to call home.  So much fright, can't wait for the morning light.  Soon I learn to fight, lie, cheat and steal.  All pride is lost by begging for every meal.  Covered with dirt, no one looks at me.  Oh, how it used to be...  No one knows that I'm gone, they just keep moving on and on.  Woke up today, just like any other day.  Pack my things, beg for change, and I'm on my way.  There was a time when I was like you, but I slipped through.  I was kicked from the game, and it's never been the same.

I spied a frog, it's mournful cry echoed as it was soon to die.  In the mouth, then the throat.  No sign of its croak now.  The snake it crawled through the grass, soon consumed, turned to ash.  Fire spread, took its toll.  Soon new life will fill the knoll.  It goes on, fight to survive, no need for feelings to stay alive.  Watch the magic swim and sing, it's all in check, the nature of things.  Watching all this in the trees, is a deer, a tick on its knee.  Unknown to its host.  In the hair, it makes the most.  Way down deep in the lake, thousands of eggs a fish does make.  In a flash, they disappear.  This food comes once a year.  As the night veils the sky, soon an owl begins to fly.  Searching for unwary prey, Skim the ground, carries away.  It goes on, fight to survive, no need for feelings to stay alive.  Watch the magic swim and sing, it's all in check, the nature of things.

Such a special season for many a reason.  We all have traditions, favorites and a mission.  See the fresh white from the night time's snow fall.  There is a magic in the air, everywhere the silence is.  Black night but a hint of the "Lights" flicker in the sky.  Stars so bright, no sign of a city in sight.  My pace is slow, I struggle to lift my feet up from the snow.  I let myself go, falling into the cold.  Where I am I don't have this, winter's chill I surely miss.  Here the sun it always shines, I wish the season could be mine.  Where I am I don't have this, winter's chill I surely miss.  I close my eyes and picture the scene.  Ice crystals on the lake, life awaits Spring to awaken.  Tracks on the ground but December's creatures can't be found.  As I sleep on the sheer white layer covering the deep, I hear the cracking sounds all around.  Sliding quickly through the trees, falling flakes my tongue does seize.  I saw my breath but it disappeared, leaving a clue clinging to my beard.  The scent of pine bathes my nose, while frost chills it and my toes.  Soon I long for the fire, my bones they tire.  Where I am I don't have this, winter's chill I surely miss.  Here the sun it always shines, I wish the season could be mine.  Where I am I don't have this, winter's chill I surely miss.  I close my eyes and picture the scene.